3/1 In the basement N can hear my steps as I pace up and down while thinking. He can tell what mood I’m in and how it’s going. He calls it I’m parallel-parking my soul.

2/29 Seeing those people who never left my hometown feels like looking into an Egyptian tomb.

2/28 A ship is heading towards an iceberg and passengers line up on the railing and blow. It may not achieve much, they say, but it’s important to set a good example so that other people come and also blow. – No, the only way to turn that ship is to use the rudder. It seems to me that this is the climate situation, but I am not sure if the actual numbers line up with that.

2/27 Team happy hour in a noisy bar at 55th street, shouting at each other in appreciation for two hours. Walking home through rain, four blocks to the subway and four blocks from the subway. It’s a time when iconic photos of Manhattan could be made, when everybody looks barely a few feet around themselves, huddled in raincoats, and the photographer simply looks down a street.

2/26 I wanted to do a mild run this afternoon, but when I got down to the street, the watch suggested 15 minutes of threshold, and I was game. Also, gym after run. I cannot make more time for the gym, but I can work harder when in the gym. Which I will do. – J got an injection into her hip joints today and we are hoping it will make a significant difference. I have never felt so happy doing something for someone, such minor efforts, and oh the joy that it brings her. This is the key to having all the time in the world that I need for myself – giving it away to her freely. 

2/25 Everything’s full of opinions, I don’t want to have any opinions.

2/24 It was already a few months ago that we decided to drive to Plattsburgh for the eclipse, and we booked a hotel there for the weekend, but I’ve looked at the weather stats for the North East in April, and it looks really bad. Yesterday I just took the plunge and booked us a flight to Austin from Burlington on Sunday and back on Tuesday, plus two nights in a hotel in Austin. I was surprised I still had no difficulty finding seats and a bed. We could scrap that at the last minute and stay in Plattsburgh in the odd chance of the weather outlook being reversed between the two cities. I feel better now. An eclipse is not something to take really bad odds with. – I feel weird though that I can easily afford this, an expense that would have been completely out of the question a few years ago. There’s quite a few things I can easily afford now. I need to watch out that I don’t afford too many of those things which I can now afford easily.

2/23 Picked up J’s credenza from the antique store, a heavy mid century piece which took four people to push into her Venza, protected haphazardly by a few blankets, ferried across the pothole streets of Newburgh, me on the flattened passenger seat with my back leaning against it, after which N helped us carry it in here, with all six drawers taken out, and it was still barely manageable. Unbelievable how many scratches and small imperfections you can see up close and from unusual angles, and how first-class the piece looks once it’s in the room. As to her furniture, J has just gotten twenty years older, and we are thrilled by it.

2/22 Hudson Valley ice grey, the water, the crests.

2/21 More coherent.