7/16 The sun is a faint orange ball in the sky, more than what you’d see through normal clouds, less than what regular haze would let through, it’s the wildfires in Canada.

I’m getting into states of panic, frequently, while being here with the kids. Feelings of inadequacy and overwhelm. I will need to get to the bottom of this. Is it because I was once shut out of this family with lawyers and courts, did that leave a trauma? I don’t have any conscious awareness of it, but I guess it might be that.